"b di ammaaaa, o b di ammaaaa ! phoopha ji rooth ge haian... kah rahe haian ki maian to shadi chho d ke vapas saharanapur ja raha hooan...."
"are beta ! tere phoopha to har shadi mean roothate haian, too apane jayapur vale jija ko dekh kahian vo bhi na rooth gaya ho... aur apane phoopha ko mere pas bhej dena, maianne usake lie khir banavaee hai aur lallo mal halavaee se panjabi kalakand bhi mangavaya hai... chal too dekh apana kam... shadi ka kam bhi to phail raha hai... kaun dekhega... aian ?"
shadi ka kam zor shor se chal raha hai aur vo shadi hi kya jisamean roothana-manana n ho. vaise bhi jija aur phoopha to bhagavan ne banae hi roothane ke lie haian. shadi-byah aur kisi n kisi tyohar ya kisi utsav ki tak mean baithe hue ye masoom aur bhole-bhale phoopha aur jija ekadam se 'kaikayi' ka avatar ban jate haian. is shubh avasar par inake jo sanvad hote haian ve khas taur se lalita pavar aur prem chop da ke lie likhe hote haian.
jaise-
"haan ji! hamean koee kyoan poochhega, ham to purane ho ge... aur hamare pas to iandaur valoan ki tarah kar bhi nahian hai... ab motarasaikil vale to motarasaikil vale hi raheange... chal be ! pan laga jaldi... kivam aur ilayachi dal dena..."
shadiyoan mean ek khas shakhs bhi hota hai jo shadi eksapart hota hai. vaise to ye eksapart chunav, jalase, jhag da adi sabhi mean hote haian lekin shadiyoan valoan ka mamala zara alag hai.
is shadi mean chhote pahalavan 'shadi visheshajn' ban kar ae haian aur is samay halavaee se vartalap kar rahe haian-
chhote pahalavan: "ek kilo maida mean kitani kachau di nikal rahe ho ?"
halavaee: "ek kilo mean ! atharah nikal raha hooan... kyoan kya ho gaya ?" halavaee ne aise vyangyapoorn mudra mean ashchary vyakt kiya jaise jahaz chalate hue payalॅt se koee sadharan yatri k aaukapit mean jakar havaee jahaz chalane ke bare mean saval kar raha ho."
chhote pahalavan: "atharah ? ye kya kar rahe ho yar ? ek kilo maida mean atharah kachau di ?" chhote pahalavan ne ashchary vyakt kiya aur halavaee ko kachau diyoan ka ganit skool ke haidamastar ki tarah vistar se samajhaya.
chhote pahalavan: "dekho guru ! aisa hai ki ajakal itani 'hॅvi' kachau di koee nahian khata. mere dada ji the jo ek kilo mean chaudah kachau di banavate the aur ek bar mean ek darjan kachau di kheanch jate the lekin vo paanch sau dand bhi lagate the. ajakal kilo mean atharah kachau di koee nahian khata... bhaiya mere... log to sara din kanpyootar par baithe rahate haian... duniya to fesabuk pe p di rahati hai. kachau di kaun pachaega... aian ? to tum to kilo mean bis-baees kachau di nikalo... samajhe ?"
halavaee: "mujhe kya hai maian to pachchis nikal dooanga... mere bap ka kya ja raha hai ?"
chhote pahalavan: are to kya gol gappe tho de hi banane haian... ek kilo mean baees kachau di thik hai...oke ?"
halavaee: "oke ji oke! lekin seth ji zara kali mirch to mangava do kisi ko shahar ki taraf bhej ke."
chhote pahalavan: "ye seth ji kis ko bol rahe ho ? ham pahalavan haian... pahalavan samajhe..."
halavaee: "thik hai pahalavan ji kali mirch khatm ho gee hai. mangava dijie"
chhote pahalavan: "mangavate haian, zara pahale baratiyoan ka subah ka iantazam kar dean."
ab chhote pahalavan l daki ke mama ke pas pahuanche jahaan par subah ke vaqt baratiyoan ko nashta karane aur raste ke lie bas mean khana rakhavane ki bat chal rahi thi.
mama: "aisa hai pahalavan nashte ka iantazam to ho gaya, ab baratiyoan ko raste ke lie aloo matar ki sookhi sabzi aur poori taiyar karava deange, thik hai ki nahian...?"
chhote pahalavan: "bilkul galat hai...."
mama: "matalab ?"
chhote pahalavan: "matalab ye ki aloo matar ki sookhi sabzi nahian banegi."
mama: "to phir...?"
chhote pahalavan: "phir kya !.... sabzi hogi matar ki, aur us par aloo ke chhiante... !" ye kahakar pahalavan ne ek aankh dabaee aur phir prashnavachak mudra bana li aur bola " kuchh samajhe...?"
mama: "nahian samajhe...?"
chhote pahalavan: "matalab ye hai mama ! ki matar ki sabzi par aloo ke patale-patale tuk de dale hoange jisase ki hamari reesi ka pata baratiyoan ko chale... are mama ! aloo haian das rupaye kilo aur matar is samay manhagi hai, poore pachas rupaye kilo. to phir barati kahian ye n samajhean ki saste aloo se taraka die... isalie sabzi matar ki hogi aur aloo ke to bas chhiante...!" pahalavan ne apani bat mean rahasy paida karane ke lie akhiri shabdoan ko phusaphusa kar kaha.
mama: "lekin pahalavan do bas bhar ke barat hai aur matar to manhagi p degi...?"
chhote pahalavan: "n n n n ap chianta hi mat karo... sara paisa pooriyoan mean vasool ho jaega." pahalavan ne apana muanh mama ke kan ke pas le jakar kaha "dekho mama ! agar dalada mean poori banane se pahale tho di si lauang dalakar garm kar liya jay to ghi jaisi hi khushaboo ati hai pooriyoan mean se... haanaaa maian pakki bat bata raha hooan... bas ap chianta hi mat karo... mere oopar chho d do..."
pahalavan ki bat sun kar mama ke chehare par vahi muskan a gee jo tivi par sakshatkar dete samay, chunav ke natije paksh mean ate dekh kar parti pravaktaoan ke chehare par hoti hai. (yah ek vishesh prakar ki muskan hoti hai jise chhipane ki utani koshish nahian ki jati jitani se ki ye chhip jaye.)
tabhi bantoo a gaya...
bantoo: "mama ji, mama ji ! tin sau rupaye de do...."
bantoo ke saval ko 'farst slip' mean kh de chhote pahalavan ne mama ji tak pahuanchane se pahale hi lapak liya.
chhote pahalavan: tin sau rupaye kis lie chahie bantoo beta ?"
bantoo: "sau ka pॅtrol aur baqi ki kali mirch... shahar ja raha hooan... halavaee bhej raha hai."
chhote pahalavan: "beta bantooaaa ! zara sabr karo... chalo maian chalata hooan halavaee ke pas."
halavaee ke pas pahuanch kar chhote pahalavan ne is aandaz mean bat karana shuroo kiya jaise ki adalat mean koee siniyar vakil kisi bahut jooniyar vakil se yah man kar jirah karata hai ki 'ye bachcha mere samane kya hai.'.
chhote pahalavan: "haan ji ! to tumako kali mirch chahie ?"
halavaee : tho da laparavahi se "haan chahie kyoan kya bat ho gee ?"
chhote pahalavan: "nahian-nahian bat to kuchh nahian hai lekin ek list bana li jay ki bazar se kya-kya mangana hai to shahar se ek bar mean hi sara saman a jaega. bar-bar shahar ke chakkar lagane se bacha ja sakata hai kyoan ?" itana kah kar pahalavan ne bantoo ki taraf ek aankh jhapakaee. bantoo ke chehare par muskan a gee aur halavaee jhak mar kar bazar ki soochi banane laga.
tabhi mama ji ne akar ek buri khabar sunaee-
"pahalavan gazab ho gaya... barat to raste se hi vapas le jane ki bat ho rahi hai... kyoanki doolhe ka bap dahez mean motarasaikil ke bajay kar maang raha hai...?"
aie is shadi se, ab vapas bharatakosh par chalean...
bharat ke bare mean kaha jata hai ki bharat ek krishi pradhan desh hai lekin kaha yah jana chahie ki 'bharat ek, krishi aur dahez pradhan desh hai.' shreni mazadoor ho, madhy varg ho ya uchch varg... dahez to pratyek shreni mean chalata hai. jab shadiyoan ka 'sizan' hota hai to bazar mean bikri kee guna badh jati hai.
gaanvoan aur chhote shaharoan ke madhy vargiy parivaroan mean chalane vali dahez soochi-
bijali ki suvidha se pahale-
gay-bhaians, bail-bakari, khat (charapaee), mathani (chhachh chalane ke lie), dari, bijana (hath ke pankhe jinhean sanskrit mean vyajanam kahate haian), soop aur chhalana, khor (bina ruee ki razaee), mitti, kaanse aur pital ke bartan, lohe ka baksa adi.
bijali ki suvidha ke bad-
saikil, tebal fain, palang, alamari, rediyo, tin ka baksa, chamade़ ka sootakes, bistaraband (h aaul d aaul), stenalॅs stil ke bartan adi.
plastik aur ilॅktr aauniks ke bad-
ti.vi., phriz, motar saikil ya skootar, plastik ka sootakes, traanzistar, plastik saman adi
vartaman yug ke dahez to ham rozana dekhate hi haian. yadi gaharaee se dekhean to bharat ki janata ki arthavyavastha ka marm dahez mean nihit hai. madhyavargiy parivaroan ki pahuanch vale bazar ka adhyayan karean to aisa lagata hai jaise dahez ke saman se ate p de haian. yadi in dukanadaroan se kah diya jay ki dahez ka rivaz khatm ho raha hai to kuchh ko behoshi chha jaegi.
zara sochie kisi madhyavargiy dampati ke bare mean jisaki do-tin betiyaan hoan. inaki shadiyoan ke bad is dampati par apane budhape ke lie kya bach paega. yadi betiyaan apane pairoan par kh di hoti haian tabhi kuchh sanbhavana hai ki apane abhibhavakoan ke lie kuchh kar paean.
uttar bharat mean, visheshakar uttarapradesh mean do galiyoan ka prachalan raha hai, ek to hai 'beti ke bap' aur doosari hai 'bhaanji ke mama. zara sochie is nikrisht manasikata ke bare mean jahaan is prakar ki galiyaan chalati rahi haian aur kahian-kahian ab bhi chal rahi haian. beti ka bap hona ya mama hona gali kyoan hai. kisi ke beti paida hona kya itana bura hai ? isaka sabase b da karan hai 'dahez pratha' aur dahez pratha ka mukhy karan hai l dakiyoan ka atm nirbhar n hona. ham aksar dekhate haian ki l dake valoan ki or se ghareloo l daki ki maang hoti hai. b di ajib bat hai ki l daki padhi-likhi bhi honi chahie aur adhunik bhi lekin koee naukari ya vyapar n kare keval ghar ki shobha hi bani rahe.
adhikatar striyoan ka vichar apani beti ke bare mean to yah rahata hai ki 'jo mujhe nahian mil paya, vah meri beti ko milana chahie lekin bahoo ke bare mean soch doosari hi rahati hai ki 'jo mujhe nahian mila vah meri bahoo ko kaise milane dooangi !'. sas bahuoan ke vivad ke vishay ko lekar filmean banati haian, dharavahik banate haian. kahate haian zamana badal gaya... badal to gaya lekin zara madhyavargiy parivaroan ke halat dekhiye to kuchh bhi nahian badala... vahi hai sab-kuchh... bahuoan ki zindagi ghooanghat se shuroo hokar maraghat tak khatm hone ke bich mean kab-kahaan usaka vyaktigat jivan hota hai ye pata lagana mushkil hai.
is bar itana hi... agali bar kuchh aur...
-adity chaudhari
sansthapak evan pradhan sampadak
