संदेह -जयशंकर प्रसाद

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is lekh ka punarikshan evan sampadan hona avashyak hai. ap isamean sahayata kar sakate haian. "sujhav"

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ramanihal apana bikhara hua saman baandhane mean laga. jangale se dhoop akar usake chhote-se shishe par t dap rahi thi. apana ujjval alok-khand, vah chhota-sa darpan buddh ki sundar pratima ko arpan kar raha tha. kintu pratima dhyanamagn thi. usaki aankhe dhoop se chauandhiyati n thian. pratima ka shant gambhir mukh aur bhi prasann ho raha tha. kintu ramanihal udhar dekhata n tha. usake hathoan mean tha ek kagajoan ka bandal, jise sandook mean rakhane ke pahale vah kholana chahata tha. padhऩe ki ichchha thi, phir bhi n jane kyoan hichak raha tha aur apane ko mana kar raha tha, jaise kisi bhayanak vastu se bachane ke lie koee balak ko rokata ho.

bandal to rakh diya par doosara b da-sa liphapha khol hi dala. ek chitr usake hathoan mean tha aur aankhoan mean the aansoo. kamare mean ab do pratima thian. buddhadev apani virag-mahima mean nimagn. ramanihal ragashail-sa achal, jisamean se hriday ka drav aansuoan ki nirjharini banakar dhire-dhire bah raha tha.

kishori ne akar halla macha diya-‘‘bhabhi, are bhabhi! dekha nahian toone, n! nihal baboo ro rahe haian. are, too chal bhi!’’

shyama vahaan akar kh di ho gayi. usake ane par bhi ramanihal usi bhav mean vismrit-sa apani karuna-dhara baha raha tha. shyama ne kaha-‘‘nihal baboo!’’

nihal ne aankhean kholakar kaha-‘‘kya hai? .... are, mujhe kshama kijie.’’ phir aansoo pochhane laga.

‘‘bat kya hai, kuchh sunooan bhi. tum kyoan jane ke samay aise dukhi ho rahe ho? kya ham logoan se kuchh aparadh hua?’’

‘‘tumase aparadh hoga? yah kya kah rahi ho? maian rota hooan, isamean meri hi bhool hai. prayashchit karane ka yah dhang thik nahian, yah maian dhire-dhire samajh raha hooan. kintu karooan kya? yah man nahian manata.’’

shyama jaise savadhan ho gayi. usane pichhe phirakar dekha ki kishori kh di hai. shyama ne kaha-‘‘ja beti! kap de dhoop mean phaile haian, vahian baith.’’ kishori chali gee. ab jaise sunane ke lie prastut hokar shyama ek chataee khianchakar baith gayi. usake samane chhoti-si buddhapratima sagavan ki sundar mej par dhoop ke pratibimb mean hans rahi thi. ramanihal kahane laga-

‘‘shyama! tumhara kathor vrat, vaidhavy ka adarsh dekhakar mere hriday mean vishvas hua ki manushy apani vasanaoan ka daman kar sakata hai. kintu tumhara avalamb b da dridh hai. tumhare samane balakoan ka jhund hansata, khelata, l data, jhag data hai. aur tumane jaise bahut-si dev-pratimaean, shrriangar se sajakar hriday ki kothari ko mandir bana diya. kintu mujhako vah kahaan milata. bharat ke bhinn-bhinn pradeshoan mean, chhota-mota vyavasay, naukari aur pet palane ki suvidhaoan ko khojata hua jab tumhare ghar mean aya, to mujhe vishvas hua ki maianne ghar paya. maian jab se sansar ko janane laga, tabhi se maian grihahin tha. mera sandook aur ye tho de-se saman, jo mere uttaradhikar ka aansh tha, apani pith par lade hue ghoomata raha. thik usi tarah, jaise kanjar apani grihasthi tattoo par lade hue ghoomata hai.

‘‘maian chatur tha, itana chatur jitana manushy ko n hona chahie; kyoanki mujhe vishvas ho gaya hai ki manushy adhik chatur banakar apane ko abhaga bana leta hai, aur bhagavanh ki daya se vanchit ho jata hai.

‘‘meri mahatvakaanksha, mere unnatishil vichar mujhe barabar dau date rahe. maian apani kushalata se apane bhagy ko dhokha deta raha. yah bhi mera pet bhar deta tha. kabhi-kabhi mujhe aisa maloom hota ki yah daanv baitha ki maian apane ap par vijayi hua. aur maian sukhi hokar, santusht hokar chain se sansar ke ek kone mean baith jaooanga; kintu vah mrig-marichika thi.

‘‘maian jinake yahaan naukari ab tak karata raha, ve log b de hi sushikshit aur sajjan haian. mujhe manate bhi bahut haian. tumhare yahaan ghar ka-sa sukh hai; kintu yah sab mujhe chhodऩa p dega hi.’’-itani bat kahakar ramanihal chup ho gaya.

‘‘to tum kam ki ek bat n kahoge. vyarth hi itani....’’ shyama aur kuchh kahana chahati thi ki use rokakar ramanihal kahane laga, ‘‘tumako maian apana shubhachintak mitr aur rakshak samajhata hooan, phir tumase n kahooanga, to yah bhar kab tak dhota rahooanga? lo suno. yah chait hai n, haan thik! kartik ki poornima thi. maian kam-kaj se chhutti pakar sandhya ki shobha dekhane ke lie dashashvamegh ghat par jane ke lie taiyar tha ki brajakishor baboo ne kaha-‘tum to ganga-kinare tahalane jate hi ho. aj mere ek sambandhi a gaye haian, inhean bhi ek bajare par baithakar ghumate ao, mujhe aj chhutti nahian hai.

‘‘maianne svikar kar liya. aphis mean baitha raha. tho di der mean bhitar se ek purush ke sath ek sundari stri nikali aur maian samajh gaya ki mujhe inhian logoan ke sath jana hoga. brajakishor baboo ne kaha-‘manamandir ghat par bajara thik hai. nihal apake sath ja rahe haian. koee asuvidha n hogi. is samay mujhe kshama kijie. avashyak kam hai.’

‘‘purush ke muanh par ki rekhaean kuchh tan gayian. stri ne kaha-‘achchha hai. ap apana kam kijie. ham log tab tak ghoom ate haian.’

‘‘ham log manamandir pahuanche. bajare par chaandani bichhi thi. purush-‘mohan baboo’ jakar oopar baith gaye. pai di lagi thi. manorama ko chadhऩe mean jaise dar lag raha tha. maian bajare ke kone par kh da tha. hath badhakar maianne kaha, ap chali aie, koee dar nahian. usane hath pak d liya. oopar ate hi mere kan mean dhire se usane kaha-‘mere pati pagal banaye ja rahe haian. kuchh-kuchh haian bhi. tanik savadhan rahiega. nav ki bat hai.’

‘‘maianne kah diya-‘koee chinta nahian’ kintu oopar jakar baith jane par bhi mere kanoan ke samip us sundar mukh ka surabhit nishvas apani anubhooti de raha tha. maianne man ko shant kiya. chaandani nikal ayi thi. ghat par akash-dip jal rahe the aur ganga ki dhara mean bhi chhote-chhote dipak bahate hue dikhaee dete the.

‘‘mohan baboo ki b di-b di gol aankhean aur bhi phail gayian. unhoanne kaha-‘manorama, dekho, is dipadan ka kya arth hai, tum samajhati ho?’

‘gangaji ki pooja, aur kya?’-manorama ne kaha.

‘yahi to mera aur tumhara matabhed hai. jivan ke laghu dip ko anant ki dhara mean baha dene ka yah sanket hai. ah! kitani sundar kalpana!’-kahakar mohan baboo jaise uchchhvasit ho uthe. unaki sharirik chetana manasik anubhooti se milakar uttejit ho uthi. manorama ne mere kanoan mean dhire se kaha-‘dekha n apane!’

‘‘maian chakit ho raha tha. bajara panchaganga ghat ke samip pahuanch gaya tha. tab hansate hue manorama ne apane pati se kaha-‘aur yah baansoan mean jo tange hue dipak haian, unhean ap kya kaheange?’

‘‘turant hi mohan baboo ne kaha-‘akash bhi asim hai n. jivan-dip ko usi or jane ke lie yah bhi sanket hai.’ phir haanphate hue unhoanne kahana arambh kiya-‘tum logoan ne mujhe pagal samajh liya hai, yah maian janata hooan. oh! sansar ki vishvasaghat ki thokaroan ne mere hriday ko vikshipt bana diya hai. mujhe usase vimukh kar diya hai. kisi ne mere manasik viplavoan mean mujhe sahayata nahian di. maian hi sabake lie mara karooan. yah ab mai nahian sah sakata. mujhe akapat pyar ki avashyakata hai. jivan mean vah kabhi nahian mila! tumane bhi manorama! tumane, bhi mujhe....’

manorama ghabara uthi thi. usane kaha-‘chup rahie, apaki tabiyat big d rahi hai, shant ho jaie!’

‘‘kyoan shant ho jaooan? ramanihal ko dekh kar chup rahooan. vah jan jayan, isamean mujhe koee bhay nahian. tum log chhipakar saty ko chhalana kyoan banati ho?’ mohan baboo ke shvasoan ki gati tivr ho uthi. manorama ne hatash bhav se meri or dekha. vah chaandani rat mean vishuddh pratima-si nishchesht ho rahi thi.

‘‘maianne savadhan hokar kaha-‘maanjhi, ab ghoom chalo.’ kartik ki rat chaandani se shital ho chali thi. nav manamandir ki or ghoom chali. maian mohan baboo ke manovikar ke sambandh mean soch raha tha. kuchh der chup rahane ke bad mohan baboo phir apane ap kahane lage-

‘brajakishor ko maian pahachanata hooan. manorama, usane tumhare sath milakar jo shadyantr racha hai, mujhe pagal bana dene ka jo upay ho raha hai, use maian samajh raha hooan. to ....’

‘oh! ap chup n raheange? maian kahati hooan n! yah vyarth ka sandeh ap man se nikal dijie ya mere lie sankhiya manga dijie. chhutti ho.’

‘‘svasth hokar b di komalata se mohan baboo kahane lage-‘tumhara apaman hota hai! sabake samane mujhe yah batean n kahani chahie. yah mera aparadh hai. mujhe kshama karo, manorama!’ sachamuch manorama ke komal charan mohan baboo ke hath mean the! vah pair chhu dati huee pichhe khisaki. mere sharir se usaka sparsh ho gaya. vah kshubdh aur sankoch mean oobh-choobh ramani jaise kisi ka ashray pane ke lie vyakul ho gayi thi. manorama ne dinata se meri or dekhate hue kaha-‘ap dekhate haian?’

‘‘sachamuch maian dekh raha tha. ganga ki ghor dhara par bajara phisal raha tha. nakshatr bikhar rahe the. aur ek sundari yuvati mera ashray khoj rahi thi. apani sab lajja aur apaman lekar vah durvah sandeh-bhar se pi dit stri jab kahati thi ki ‘ap dekhate haian n’, tab vah mano mujhase prarthana karati thi ki kuchh mat dekho, mera vyangy-upahas dekhane ki vastu nahian.

‘‘maian chup tha. ghat par bajara laga. phir vah yuvati mera hath pak dakar pai di par se samhalati huee utari. aur maianne ek bar n jane kyoan dhrishtata se man mean socha ki ‘maian dhany hooan.’ mohan baboo oopar chadhऩe lage. maian manorama ke pichhe-pichhe tha. apane par bhari bojh dalakar dhire-dhire sidhiy़oan par chadh raha tha.

‘‘usane dhire se mujhase kaha, ‘ramanihalaji, meri vipatti mean ap sahayata n kijiega!’ maian avakh tha.

shyama ne ek gahari drishti se ramanihal ko dekha. vah chup ho gaya. shyama ne ajna bhare svar mean kaha, ‘‘age aur bhi kuchh hai ya bas?’’

ramanihal ne sir jhuka kar kaha, ‘‘haan, aur bhi kuchh hai.’’

‘‘vahi kaho n!!’’

‘‘kahata hooan. mujhe dhire-dhire maloom hua ki brajakishor baboo yah chahate haian ki mohanalal adalat se pagal man liye jayan aur brajakishor unaki sampatti ke prabandhak bana diye jayan, kyoanki ve hi mohanalal ke nikat sambandhi the. bhagavanh jane isamean kya rahasy hai, kintu sansar to doosare ko moorkh banane ke vyavasay par chal raha hai. mohan apane sandeh ke karan poora pagal ban gaya hai. tum jo yah chitthiyoan ka bandal dekh rahi ho, vah manorama ka hai.’’

ramanihal phir ruk gaya. shyama ne phir tikhi drishti se usaki or dekha. ramanihal kahane laga, ‘‘tumako bhi sandeh ho raha hai. so thik hi hai. mujhe bhi kuchh sandeh ho raha hai, manorama kyoan mujhe is samay bula rahi hai.’’

ab shyama ne hansakar kaha, ‘‘to kya tum samajhate ho ki manorama tumako pyar karati hai aur vah dushcharitra hai? chhi: ramanihal, yah tum kyoan soch rahe ho? dekhooan to, tumhare hath mean yah kaun-sa chitr hai, kya manorama ka hi?’’ kahate-kahate shyama ne ramanihal ke hath se chitr le liya. usane ashchary-bhare svar mean kaha, ‘‘are, yah to mera hi hai? to kya tum mujhase prem karane ka l dakapan karate ho? yah achchhi phaansi lagi hai tumako. manorama tumako pyar karati hai aur tum mujhako. man ke vinod ke lie tumane achchha sadhan jutaya hai. tabhi kayaroan ki tarah yahaan se boriya-bandhana lekar bhagane ki taiyari kar li hai!’’

ramanihal hatbuddhi aparadhi-sa shyama ko dekhane laga. jaise use kahian bhagane ki rah n ho. shyama dridh svar mean kahane lagi-

‘‘nihal baboo! pyar karana b da kathin hai. tum is khel ko nahian janate. isake chakkar mean padऩa bhi mat. haan, ek dukhiya stri tumako apani sahayata ke lie bula rahi hai. jao, usaki sahayata karake laut ao. tumhara saman yahian rahega. tumako abhi yahian rahana hoga. samajhe. abhi tumako meri sanrakshata ki avashyakata hai. utho. naha-dho lo. jo tren mile, usase patane jakar brajakishor ki chalakiyoan se manorama ki raksha karo. aur phir mere yahaan chale ana. yah sab tumhara bhram tha. sandeh tha.’’

ramanihal dhire se uthakar nahane chala gaya.