नरक का मार्ग -प्रेमचंद

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is lekh ka punarikshan evan sampadan hona avashyak hai. ap isamean sahayata kar sakate haian. "sujhav"

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rat 'bhaktamal' padhate-padhate n jane kab niand a gayi. kaise-kaise mahatma the jinake lie bhagavath-prem hi sabakuchh tha, isi mean magn rahate the. aisi bhakti b di tapasya se milati hai. kya maian yah tapasya nahian kar sakati? is jivan mean aur kaun-sa sukh rakha hai? abhooshanoan se jise prem ho vah jane, yahaan to inako dekhakar aankhean phootati haian; dhan-daulat par jo pran deta ho vah jane, yahaan to isaka nam sunakar jvar-sa chadh ata hai. kal pagali sushila ne kitani umangoan se mera shrriangar kiya tha, kitane prem se baloan mean phool gooanthe the. kitana mana karati rahi, n mani. akhir vahi hua jisaka mujhe bhay tha. jitani der usake sath hansi thi, usase kahian zyada royi. sansar mean aisi bhi koee stri hai, jisaka pati usaka shrriangar dekh kar sir se paanv tak jal uthe? kaun aisi stri hai jo apane pati ke muanh se ye shabd sune- tum mera paralok biga dogi, aur kuchh nahian, tumhare rang-dhang kahe dete haian- aur usaka dil vish kha lene ko n chahe? bhagavanh! sansar mean aise bhi manushy haian. akhir maian niche chali gayi aur 'bhaktamal' padhane lagi. ab vriandavan-bihari hi ki seva karooangi, unhian ko apana shrriangar dikhaooangi, vah to dekhakar n jaleange, vah to mere man ka hal janate haian.

2 bhagavanh! maian apane man ko kaise samajhaooan! tum aantaryami ho, tum mere rom-rom ka hal janate ho. maian chahati hooan ki unhean apana isht samajhooan, unake charanoan ki seva karooan, unake ishare par chalooan, unhean meri kisi bat se, kisi vyavahar se namamatr bhi du:kh n ho. vah nirdosh haian, jo kuchh mere bhagy mean tha vah hua, n unaka dosh hai, n mata-pita ka, sara dosh mere nasiboan hi ka hai. lekin yah sab janate hue bhi jab unhean ate dekhati hooan, to mera dil baith jata hai, muanh par muradani-si chha jati hai, sir bhari ho jata hai; ji chahata hai inaki soorat n dekhooan, bat tak karane ko ji nahian chahata; kadachith shatru ko bhi dekh kar kisi ka man itana klaant n hota hoga. unake ane ke samay dil mean dh dakan-si hone lagati hai. do-ek din ke lie kahian chale jate haian to dil par se ek bojh-sa uth jata hai; hansati bhi hooan, bolati bhi hooan, jivan mean kuchh anand ane lagata hai lekin unake ane ka samachar pate hi phir charoan or aandhakar! chitt ki aisi dasha kyoan hai, yah maian nahian kah sakati. mujhe to aisa jan p data hai ki poorvajanm mean ham donoan mean vair tha, usi vair ka badala lene ke lie inhoanne mujhase vivah kiya hai, vahi purane sanskar hamare man mean bane hue haian. nahian to vah mujhe dekh-dekhakar kyoan jalate aur maian unaki soorat se kyoan ghrina karati? vivah karane ka to yah matalab nahian hua karata! maian apane ghar isase kahian sukhi thi. kadachith maian jivan-paryant apane ghar anand se rah sakati thi. lekin is lok-pratha ka bura ho, jo abhagini kanyaoan ko kisi-n-kisi purush ke gale mean baandh dena anivary samajhati hai. vah kya janata hai ki kitani yuvatiyaan usake nam ko ro rahi haian, kitane abhilashaoan se laharate hue, komal hriday usake pairoan tale rauande ja rahe haian? yuvati ke lie pati kaisi-kaisi madhur kalpanaoan ka srot hota hai, purush mean jo uttam hai, shreshth hai, darshaniy hai, usaki sajiv moorti is shabd ke dhyan mean ate hi usaki najaroan ke samane akar kh di ho jati hai. lekin mere lie yah shabd kya hai. hriday mean uthanevala shool, kaleje mean khatakanevala kaanta, aankhoan mean g danevali kirakiri, ant:karan ko bedhanevala vyangy-ban! sushila ko hamesha hansate dekhati hooan. vah kabhi apani daridrata ka gila nahian karati; gahane nahian haian, kap de nahian haian, bha de ke nanhe se makan mean rahati hai, apane hathoan ghar ka sara kam-kaj karati hai, phir bhi use rote nahian dekhati. agar apane bas ki bat hoti to aj apane dhan ko usaki daridrata se badal leti. apane patidev ko muskarate hue ghar mean ate dekhakar usaka sara du:kh-daridray chhoomantar ho jata hai, chhati gaz-bhar ki ho jati hai. usake premaliangan mean vah sukh hai, jis par tinoan lok ka dhan nyochhavar kar dooan.

3 aj mujhase zabt n ho saka. maianne poochha- tumane mujhase kis lie vivah kiya tha? yah prashn mahinoan se mere man mean uthata tha, par man ko rokati chali ati thi. aj pyala chhalak p da. yah prashn sunakar kuchh baukhala-se gaye, bagalean jhaankane lage, khisean nikalakar bole- ghar sanbhalane ke lie, grihasthi ka bhar uthane ke lie, aur nahian kya bhog-vilas ke lie? gharani ke bina yah apako bhoot ka dera-sa maloom hota tha. naukar-chakar ghar ki sampatti u daye dete the. jo chiz jahaan p di rahati thi, vahian p di rahati thi. usako dekhanevala n tha. to ab maloom hua ki maian is ghar ki chaukasi karane ke lie layi gayi hooan. mujhe is ghar ki raksha karani chahie aur apane ko dhany samajhana chahie ki yah sari sampatti meri hai. mukhy vastu sampatti hai, maian to keval chaukidarin hooan. aise ghar mean aj hi ag lag jay! ab tak to maian anajan mean ghar ki chaukasi karati thi, jitana vah chahate haian utana n sahi, par apani budhdi ke anusar avashy karati thi. aj se kisi chiz ko bhoolakar bhi chhoone ki kasam khati hooan. yah maian janati hooan ki koee purush ghar ki chaukasi ke lie vivah nahian karata aur in mahashay ne chidhakar yah bat mujhase kahi. lekin sushila thik kahati hai, inhean stri ke bina ghar soona lagata hoga, usi tarah jaise pianjare mean chi diya ko n dekhakar pianjara soona lagata hai. yah hai ham striyoan ka bhagy!

4 maloom nahian, inhean mujh par itana sandeh kyoan hota hai. jab se nasib is ghar mean laya hai, inhean barabar sandeh-moolak kataksh karate dekhati hooan. kya karan hai? jara bal guanthavakar baithi aur yah oth chabane lage. kahian jati nahian, kahian ati nahian, kisi se bolati nahian, phir bhi itana sandeh! yah apaman asahy hai. kya mujhe apani abaroo pyari nahian? yah mujhe itani chhichhori kyoan samajhate haian, inhean mujh par sandeh karate lajja bhi nahian ati? kana adami kisi ko hansate dekhata hai to samajhata hai log mujhi par hans rahe haian. shayad inhean bhi yahi vaham ho gaya hai ki maian inhean chidhati hooan. apane adhikar ke bahar koee kam kar baithane se kadachith hamare chitt ki yahi vritti ho jati hai. bhikshuk raja ki gaddi par baithakar chain ki niand nahian so sakata. use apane charoan taraph shatru hi shatru dikhayi deange. maian samajhati hooan, sabhi shadi karanevale bundhoan ka yahi hal hai.

aj sushila ke kahane se maian thakuraji ki jhaanki dekhane ja rahi thi. ab yah sadharan budhdi ka adami bhi samajh sakata hai ki phooh d bahoo ban kar bahar nikalana apani hansi u dana hai, lekin ap usi vakt n-jane kidhar se tapak p de aur meri or tiraskarapoorn netroan se dekh kar bole- kahaan ki taiyari hai?

maianne kah diya, jara thakuraji ki jhaanki dekhane jati hooan. itana sunate hi tyoriyaan chadhakar bole- tumhare jane ki kuchh zaroorat nahian. jo stri apane pati ki seva nahian kar sakati, use devataoan ke darshan se puny ke badale pap hota hai! mujhase u dane chali ho. maian auratoan ki nas-nas pahachanata hooan.

aisa krodh aya ki bas ab kya kahooan. usi dam kap de badal dale aur pran kar liya ki ab kabhi darshan karane n jaooangi. is avishvas ka bhi kuchh thikana hai! n-jane kya sochakar ruk gayi. unaki bat ka javab to yahi tha ki usi kshan ghar se chal kh di hoti, phir dekhati mera kya kar lete!

inhean mera udas aur viman rahane par ashchary hota hai. mujhe man mean kritaghn samajhate haian, apani samajh mean inhoanne mere sath vivah karake shayad mujh par b da ehasan kiya hai. itani b di jayadad aur itani vishal sampatti ki svamini hokar mujhe phoole n samana chahie tha, athoan pahar inaka yashagan karate rahana chahie tha. maian yah sabakuchh n karake ulate aur muanh latakaye rahati hooan. kabhi-kabhi mujhe bechare par daya ati hai. yah nahian samajhate ki nari jivan mean koee aisi vastu bhi hai jise khokar usaki aankhoan mean svayan bhi narakatuly ho jata hai!

5 tin din se bimar haian. daktar kahate haian, bachane ki koee asha nahian, nimoniya ho gaya hai. par mujhe n jane kyoan inaka gam nahian hai. maian itani vajr-hriday kabhi n thi. n-jane vah meri komalata kahaan chali gayi. kisi bimar ki soorat dekhakar mera hriday karuna se chanchal ho jata tha, maian kisi ka rona nahian sun sakati thi. vahi maian hooan ki aj tin din se unhean apane bagal ke kamare mean p de karahate sunati hooan; aur ek bar bhi unhean dekhane n gayi, aankh mean aansoo ane ka zikr hi kya. mujhe aisa maloom hota hai, inase mera koee nata hi nahian. mujhe chahe koee pishachini kahe, chahe kulata, par mujhe to yah kahane mean leshamatr bhi sankoch nahian hai ki inaki bimari se mujhe ek prakar ka eershya may anand a raha hai. inhoanne mujhe yahaan karavas de rakha tha- maian ise vivah ka pavitr nam nahian dena chahati- yah karavas hi hai. maian itani udar nahian hooan ki jisane mujhe kaid mean dal rakha ho usaki pooja karooan, jo mujhe lat se mare usake pairoan ko choomooan. mujhe to maloom ho raha hai, eeshvar inhean is pap ka dand de rahe haian. maian nissankoch hokar kahati hooan ki mera inase vivah nahian hua. stri kisi ke gale baandh diye jane se hi usaki vivahita nahian ho jati. vahi sanyog vivah ka pad pa sakata hai jisamean kam-se-kam ek bar to hriday prem se pulakit ho jay! sunati hooan, mahashay apane kamare mean p de-p de mujhe kosa karate haian, apani bimari ka sara bukhar mujh par nikalate haian, lekin yahaan isaki parava nahian. jisaka ji chahe jayadad le, dhan le, mujhe isaki zaroorat nahian!

6 aj tin din hue, maian vidhava ho gayi, kam-se-kam log yahi kahate haian. jisaka jo ji chahe kahe, par maian apane ko jo kuchh samajhati hooan vah samajhati hooan. maianne choo diyaan nahian to dian, kyoan to dooan? maang mean seandur pahale bhi n dalati thi, ab bhi nahian dalati. boodhe baba ka kriya-karm unake suputr ne kiya, maian pas n phataki. ghar mean mujh par manamani alochanaean hoti haian, koee mere gooanthe hue baloan ko dekhakar nak siko data hai, koee mere abhooshanoan par aankh matakata hai, yahaan isaki chinta nahian. inhean chidhane ko maian bhi rang-birangi sa diyaan pahanati hooan, aur banati-sanvarati hooan, mujhe jara bhi du:kh nahian hai. maian to kaid se chhoot gayi. idhar kee din bad sushila ke ghar gayi. chhota-sa makan hai, koee sajavat n saman, charapaiyaan tak nahian, par sushila kitane anand se rahati hai. usaka ullas dekhakar mere man mean bhi bhaanti-bhaanti ki kalpanaean uthane lagati haian- unhean kutsit kyoan kahooan, jab mera man unhean kutsit nahian samajhata. inake jivan mean kitana utsah hai. aankhean muskarati rahati haian, othoan par madhur hasy khelata rahata hai, batoan mean prem ka srot bahata hua jan p data hai. is anand se, chahe vah kitana hi kshanik ho, jivan saphal ho jata hai, phir use koee bhool nahian sakata, usaki smriti ant tak ke lie kafi ho jati hai, is mijarav ki chot hriday ke taroan ko antakal tak madhur svaroan se kampit rakh sakati hai.

ek din maianne sushila se kaha- agar tere patidev kahian paradesh chale jayan to rote-rote mar jayagi!

sushila gambhir bhav se boli- nahian bahan, marooangi nahian, unaki yad sadaiv praphullit karati rahegi, chahe unhean paradesh mean barasoan lag jayean.

maian yahi prem chahati hooan, isi chot ke lie mera man t dapata rahata hai, maian bhi aisi hi smriti chahati hooan, jisase dil ke tar sadaiv bajate rahean, jisaka nasha nity chhaya rahe.

7 rat rote-rote hichakiyaan bandh gayian. n-jane kyoan dil bhar-bhar ata tha. apana jivan samane ek bih d maidan ki bhaanti phaila hua maloom hota tha, jahaan bagooloan ke siva hariyali ka nam nahian. ghar pha de khata tha, chitt aisa chanchal ho raha tha ki kahian u d jaooan. ajakal bhakti ke granthoan ki or takane ko ji nahian chahata, kahian sair karane jane ki bhi ichchha nahian hoti, kya chahati hooan vah maian svayan nahian janati. lekin maian jo nahian janati vah mera ek-ek rom janata hai, maian apani bhavanaoan ki sajiv bhoomi hooan, mera ek-ek aang meri antarik vedana ka artanad kar raha hai.

mere chitt ki chanchalata us aantim dasha ko pahuanch gayi hai, jab manushy ko ninda ki n lajja rahati hai aur n bhay. jin lobhi, svarthi mata-pita ne mujhe kuean mean dhakela, jis pashan-hriday prani ne meri maang mean seandur dalane ka svaang kiya, unake prati mere man mean bar-bar dushkamanaean uthati haian, maian unhean lajjit karana chahati hooan. maian apane muanh mean kalikh lagakar unake mukh mean kalikh lagana chahati hooan. maian apane pran dekar unhean prandand dilana chahati hooan. mera naritv lupt ho gaya hai, mere hriday mean prachand jvala uthi huee hai. ghar ke sare adami so rahe the. maian chupake se niche utari, dvar khola aur ghar se nikali, jaise koee prani garmi se vyakul hokar ghar se nikale aur kisi khuli huee jagah ki or dau de. us makan mean mera dam ghut raha tha.

s dak par sannata tha, dookanean band ho chuki thian. sahasa ek budhiya ati huee dikhayi di. maian dari kahian chu dail n ho. budhiya ne mere samip a kar mujhe sir se paanv tak dekha aur boli- kisaki rah dekh rahi ho?

maianne chidhakar kaha- maut ki!

budhiya- tumhare nasiboan mean to abhi zindagi ke b de-b de sukh bhogane likhe haian. aandheri rat gujar gayi, asaman par subah ki roshani a rahi hai.

maianne hansakar kaha- aandhere mean bhi tumhari aankhean itani tej haian ki nasiboan ki likhavat padh leti haian?

budhiya- aankhoan se nahian padhati beti, akl se padhati hooan, dhoop mean choo de nahian suphed kiye haian. tumhare bure din gaye aur achchhe din a rahe haian. hanso mat beti, yahi kam karate itani umr gujar gayi. isi budhiya ki badaulat jo nadi mean koodane ja rahi thian, ve aj phooloan ki sej par so rahi haian; jo zahar ka pyala pine ko taiyar thian, ve aj doodh ki kulliyaan kar rahi haian. isilie itani rat gaye nikalati hooan ki apane hathoan kisi abhagin ka udhdar ho sake to karooan. kisi se kuchh nahian maangati, bhagavanh ka diya sabakuchh ghar mean hai, keval yahi ichchha hai ki apane se jahaan tak ho sake doosaroan ka upakar karooan. jinhean dhan ki ichchha hai unhean dhan, jinhean santan ki ichchha hai unhean santan, bas aur kya kahooan; vah mantr bata deti hooan ki jisaki jo ichchha ho vah poori ho jay.

maianne kaha- mujhe n dhan chahie n santan. meri manokamana tumhare bas ki bat nahian.

budhiya hansi- beti, jo tum chahati ho vah maian janati hooan; tum vah chiz chahati ho jo sansar mean hote hue svarg ki hai, jo devataoan ke varadan se bhi zyada anandaprad hai, jo akash-kusum hai, goolar ka phool hai aur amavas ka chaand hai. lekin mere mantr mean vah shakti hai jo bhagy ko bhi sanvar sakati hai. tum prem ki pyasi ho, maian tumhean us nav par baitha sakati hooan jo prem ke sagar mean, prem ki tarangoan par kri da karati huee tumhean par utar de.

maianne utkanthit hokar poochha- mata, tumhara ghar kahaan hai?

budhiya- bahut najadik hai beti, tum chalo to maian apani aankhoan par baitha kar le chalooan.

mujhe aisa maloom hua ki yah koee akash ki devi hai. usake pichhe-pichhe chal p di.

8 ah! vah budhiya, jise maian akash ki devi samajhati thi, narak ki dain nikali. mera sarvanash ho gaya. maian amrit khojati thi, vish mila, nirmal svachchh prem ki pyasi thi, gande vishakt nale mean gir p di. vah vastu n milani thi, n mili. maian sushila ka-sa sukh chahati thi, kulataoan ki vishay-vasana nahian. lekin jivan-path mean ek bar ulati rah chalakar phir sidho marg par ana kathin hai?

lekin mere adh:patan ka aparadh mere sir nahian, mere mata-pita aur us boodhe par hai jo mera svami banana chahata tha. maian yah panktiyaan n likhatian, lekin is vichar se likh rahi hooan ki meri atmakatha padhakar logoan ki aankhean khulean; maian phir kahati hooan, ab bhi apani balikaoan ke lie mat dekho dhan, mat dekho jayadad, mat dekho kulinata, keval var dekho. agar usake lie jo d ka var nahian pa sakate to l daki ko kvaanri rakh chho do, zahar dekar mar dalo, gala ghoant dalo, par kisi boodhe khoosat se mat byaho. stri sabakuchh sah sakati hai, darun se darun du:kh, b de se b da sankat, agar nahian sah sakati to apane yauvan-kal ki umangoan ka kuchala jana.

rahi maian, mere lie ab is jivan mean koee asha nahian. is adham dasha ko bhi us dasha se n badalooangi, jisase nikalakar ayi hooan.

sanbandhit lekh

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