कर्मभूमि उपन्यास भाग-2 अध्याय-7
| chitr:Icon-edit.gif | is lekh ka punarikshan evan sampadan hona avashyak hai. ap isamean sahayata kar sakate haian. "sujhav" |
kee mahine gujar ge. gaanv mean phir murada maans n aya. ashchary ki bat to yah thi ki doosare gaanv ke chamaroan ne bhi murada maans khana chho d diya. shubh udyog kuchh sankramak hota hai.
amar ki shala ab nee imarat mean a gee thi. shiksha ka logoan ko kuchh aisa chaska p d gaya tha ki javan to javan, boodhe bhi a baithate aur kuchh n kuchh sikh jate. amar ki shiksha-shaili alochanatmak thi. any deshoan ki samajik aur rajanitik pragati, ne-ne avishkar, ne-ne vichar, usake mukhy vishay the. dekh-deshaantaroan ke rasmo-rivaj, achar-vichar ki katha sabhi chav se sunate the. use yah dekhakar kabhi-kabhi vismay hota tha ki ye nirakshar log jatil samajik sidhdaantoan ko kitani asani se samajh jate haian. sare gaanv mean ek naya jivan pravahit hota hua jan p data. chhoot-chhat ka jaise lop ho gaya tha. doosare gaanvoan ki ooanchi jatiyoan ke log bhi aksar a jate the.
din-bhar ke parishram ke bad amar leta hua ek upanyas padh raha tha ki munni akar kh di ho gee. amar padhane mean itana lipt tha ki munni ke ane ki usako khabar n huee. rajasthan ki vir nariyoan ke balidan ki katha thi, us ujjval balidan ki jisaki sansar ke itihas mean kahian misal nahian hai, jise padhakar aj bhi hamari gardan garv se uth jati hai. jivan ko kisane itana tuchchh samajha hoga kul-maryada ki raksha ka aisa alaukik adarsh aur kahaan milega- aj ka buddhivad un vir mataoan par chahe jitana kich d pheank le, hamari shradhda unake charanoan par sadaiv sir jhukati rahegi.
munni chupachap kh di amar ke mukh ki or takati rahi. megh ka vah alpaansh jo aj ek sal hue usake hriday-akash mean pankshi ki bhaanti u data hua a gaya tha, dhire-dhire sanpoorn akash par chha gaya tha. atit ki jvala mean jhulasi huee kamanaean is shital chhaya mean phir hari hoti jati thian. vah shushk jivan u?an ki bhaanti saurabh aur vikas se laharane laga hai. auroan ke lie to usaki devaraniyaan bhojan pakatian, amar ke lie vah khud pakati. bechare do to rotiyaan khate haian, aur yah ganvarinean mote-mote likr banakar rakh deti haian. amar usase koee kam karane ko kahata, to usake mukh par anand ki jyoti-si jhalak uthati. vah ek ne svarg ki kalpana karane lagati-ek ne anand ka svapn dekhane lagati.
ek din saloni ne usase muskarakar kaha-amar bhaiya tere hi bhag se yahaan a ge, munni ab tere din phireange.
munni ne harsh ko jaise mutthi mean dabakar kaha-kya kahati ho kaki, kahaan maian, kahaan vah. mujhase kee sal chhote hoange. phir aise vidvanh, aise chatur maian to unaki jootiyoan ke barabar bhi nahian.
kaki ne kaha tha-yah sab thik hai munni, par tera jadoo un par chal gaya hai yah maian dekh rahi hooan. sankochi adami maloom hote haian, isase tujhase kuchh kahate nahian par too unake man mean sama gee hai, vishvas man. kya tujhe itana bhi nahian soojhata- tujhe unaki sharm door karani p degi.
munni ne pulakit hokar kaha tha-tumhari asis hai kaki, to mera manorath bhi poora ho jaega.
munni ek kshan amar ko dekhati rahi, tab jhopadi mean jakar usaki khat nikal laee. amar ka dhhyan toota. bola-rahane do, maian abhi bichhae leta hooan. tum mera itana dular karogi munni, to maian alasi ho jaooanga. ao, tumhean hindoo-deviyoan ki katha sunaooan.
'koee kahani hai kya?'
'nahian, kahani nahian, sachchi bat hai.'
amar ne musalamanoan ke hamale, kshatraniyoan ke juhar aur rajapoot viroan ke shaury ki charcha karate hue kaha-un deviyoan ko ag mean jal marana manjoor tha par yah manjoor n tha ki parapurush ki nigah bhi un par p de. apani an par mar mitati thian. hamari deviyoan ka yah adarsh tha. aj yoorop ka kya adarsh hai- jarman sipahi phraans par chadh ae aur purushoan se gaanv khali ho ge, to phraans ki nariyaan jarman sainikoan hi se prem kri da karane lagian.
munni nak siko dakar boli-b di chanchal haian sab lekin un striyoan se jite ji kaise jala jata tha-
amar ne pustak band kar di-b da kathin hai, munni yahaan to jara-si chiangari lag jati hai, to bilabila uthate haian. tabhi to aj sara sansar unake nam ke age sir jhukata hai. maian to jab yah katha padhata hooan to roean kh de ho jate haian. yahi ji chahata hai ki jis pavitr-bhoomi par un deviyoan ki chitaean banian, usaki rakh sir par chadhaooan, aankhoan mean lagaooan aur vahian mar jaooan.
munni kisi vichar mean doobi bhoomi ki or tak rahi thi.
amar ne phir kaha-kabhi-kabhi to aisa ho jata tha ki purushoan ko ghar ke maya-moh se mukt karane ke lie striyaan l daee ke pahale hi juhar kar leti thian. adami ki jan itani pyari hoti hai ki boodhe bhi marana nahian chahate. ham nana kasht jhelakar bhi jite haian, b de-b de rrishi-mahatma bhi jivan ka moh nahian chho d sakate par un deviyoan ke lie jivan khel tha.
munni ab bhi maun kh di thi. usake mukh ka rang u da hua tha, mano koee dussah aantarvedana ho rahi hai.
amar ne ghabarakar poochha-kaisa ji hai, munni- chehara kyoan utara hua hai-
munni ne kshin muskan ke sath kaha-mujhase poochhate ho- kya hua hai-
'kuchh bat to hai mujhase chhipati ho?'
'nahian ji, koee bat nahian.'
ek minat ke bad usane phir kaha-tumase aj apani katha kahooan, sunoge-
'b de harsh se maian to tumase kee bar kah chuka. tumane sunaee hi nahian.'
'maian tumase darati hooan. tum mujhe nich aur kya-kya samajhane lagoge.'
amar ne mano kshubdha hokar kaha-achchhi bat hai, mat kaho. maian to jo kuchh hooan vahi rahooanga, tumhare banane se to nahian ban sakata.
munni ne harakar kaha-tum to lala, jara-si bat par chidh jate ho, jabhi stri se tumhari nahian patati. achchha lo, suno. jo ji mean ae samajhana-maian jab kashi se chali, to tho di der tak to mujhe hosh hi n raha-kahaan jati hooan, kyoan jati hooan, kahaan se ati hooan- phir maian rone lagi. apane pyaroan ka moh saphar ki bhaanti man mean um d p da. aur maian usamean doobane-utarane lagi. ab maloom hua, kya kuchh khokar chali ja rahi hooan. aisa jan p data tha ki mera balak meri god mean ane ke lie humak raha hai. aisa moh mere man mean kabhi n jaga tha. maian usaki yad karane lagi. usaka hansana aur rona, usaki totali batean, usaka latapatate
hue chalana. use chup karane ke lie chanda mamoo ko dikhana, sulane ke lie loriyaan sunana, ek-ek bat yad ane lagi. mera vah chhota-sa sansar kitana sukhamay tha us ratn ko god mean lekar maian kitani nihal ho jati thi, mano sansar ki sanpatti mere pairoan ke niche hai. us sukh ke badale mean svarg ka sukh bhi n leti. jaise man ki sari abhilashaean usi balak mean akar jama ho gee hoan. apana toota-ththata jhoanp da, apane maile-kuchaile kap de, apana nanga-boochapan, karj-dam ki chianta, apani daridrata, apana durbhagy, ye sabhi paine kaante jaise phool ban ge. agar koee kamana thi, to yah ki mere lal ko kuchh n hone pae. aur aj usi ko chho dakar maian n jane kahaan chali ja rahi thi- mera chitt chanchal ho gaya. man ki sari smritiyaan samane dau dane vale vrikshoan ki tarah, jaise mere sath dau di chali a rahi thian, aur unhian ke sath mera balak bhi jaise mujhe dau data chala ata tha. akhir maian age n ja saki. duniya hansati hai, hanse. biradari nikalati hai, nikal de, maian apane lal ko chho dakar n jaooangi. mehanat-mazadoori karake bhi to apana nibah kar sakati hooan. apane lal ko aankhoan se dekhati to rahooangi. use meri god se kaun chhin sakata hai maian usake lie mari hooan, maianne use apane rakt se siraja hai. vah mera hai. us par kisi ka adhikar nahian.
jyoanhi lakhanoo aya, maian ga di se utar p di. maianne nishchay kar liya, lautati ga di se kashi chali jaooangi. jo kuchh hona hoga, hoga.
maian kitani der pletagarm par kh di rahi, maloom nahian. bijali ki battiyoan se sara steshan jagamaga raha tha. maian bar-bar kuliyoan se poochhati thi, kashi ki ga di kab aegi- koee das baje maloom hua, ga di a rahi hai. maianne apana saman sanbhala. dil dh dakane laga. ga di a gee. musaphir chadhane-utarane lage. kuli ne akar kaha-asabab janane dibbe mean rakhean ki mardane mean-
mere muanh se avaz n nikali.
kuli ne mere muanh ki or takate hue phir poochha-janane dibbe mean rakh dooan asabab-
maianne katar hokar kaha-maian is ga di se n jaooangi.
'ab doosari ga di das baje din ko milegi.'
'maian usi ga di se jaooangi.'
'to asabab bahar le chalooan ya musaphirakhane mean?'
'musaphirakhane mean.'
amar ne poochha-tum us ga di se chali kyoan n geean-
munni kaanpate hue svar mean boli-n jane kaisa man hone laga- jaise koee mere hath-paanv baandhe leta ho. jaise maian goo-hatya karane ja rahi hooan. in kodh bhare hathoan se maian apane lal ko kaise uthaooangi. mujhe apane pati par krodh a raha tha. vah mere sath aya kyoan nahian- agar use meri paravah hoti, to mujhe akeli ane deta- is ga di se vah bhi a sakata tha. jab usaki ichchha nahian hai, to maian bhi n jaooangi. aur n jane kaun-kaun-si batean man mean akar mujhe jaise balapoorvak rokane lagian. maian musaphirakhane mean man mare baithi thi ki ek mard apani aurat ke sath akar mere hi samip dari bichhakar baith gaya. aurat ki god mean lagabhag ek sal ka balak tha. aisa suandar balak aisa gulabi rang, aisi katore-si aankhean, aisi makkhan-si deh maian tanmay hokar dekhane lagi aur apane-parae ki sudhi bhool gee. aisa maloom hua yah mera balak hai. balak maan ki god se utarakar dhire-dhire reangata hua meri or aya. maian pichhe hat gee. balak phir meri taraph chala. maian doosari or chali gee. balak ne samajha, maian usaka anadar kar rahi hooan. rone laga. phir bhi maian usake pas n aee. usaki mata ne meri or rosh-bhari aankhoan se dekhakar balak ko dau dakar utha liya par balak machalane laga aur bar-bar meri or hath badhane laga. par maian door kh di rahi. aisa jan p data tha, mere hath kat ge haian. jaise mere hath lagate hi vah sone-sa balak kuchh aur ho jaega, usamean se kuchh nikal jaega.
stri ne kaha-l dake ko jara utha lo devi, tum to aise bhag rahi ho jaise vah achhoot hai. jo dular karate haian, unake pas to abhaga jata nahian, jo muanh pher lete haian, unaki or dau data hai.
babooji, maian tumase nahian kah sakati ki in shabdoan ne mere man ko kitani chot pahuanchaee. kaise samajha dooan ki maian kalankini hooan, papishtha hooan, mere chhoone se anisht hoga, amangal hoga. aur yah janane par kya vah mujhase phir apana balak utha lene ko kahegi .
maianne samip akar balak ki or sneh-bhari aankhoan se dekha aur darate-darate use uthane ke lie hath badhaya. sahasa balak chillakar maan ki taraph bhaga, mano usane koee bhayanak roop dekh liya ho. ab sochati hooan, to samajh mean ata hai-balakoan ka yahi svabhav hai par us samay mujhe aisa maloom hua ki sachamuch mera roop pishachini ka-sa hoga. maian lajjit ho gee.
mata ne balak se kaha-ab jata kyoan nahian re, bula to rahi haian. kahaan jaogi bahan- maianne haridvar bata diya. vah stri-purush bhi haridvar hi ja rahe the. ga di chhoot jane ke karan thahar ge the. ghar door tha. lautakar n ja sakate the. maian b di khush huee ki haridvar tak sath to rahega lekin phir vah balak meri or n aya.
tho di der mean stri-purush to so ge par maian baithi hi rahi. maan se chimata hua balak bhi so raha tha. mere man mean b di prabal ichchha huee ki balak ko uthakar pyar karooan, par dil kaanp raha tha ki kahian balak rone lage, ya mata jag jae, to dil mean kya samajhe- maian balak ka phool-sa mukh da dekh rahi thi. vah shayad koee svapn dekhakar muskara raha tha. mera dil kaboo se bahar ho gaya. maianne sote hue balak ko uthakar chhati se laga liya. par doosare hi kshan maian sachet ho gee aur balak ko lita diya. us kshanik pyar mean kitana anand tha jan p data tha, mera hi balak yah roop dharakar mere pas a gaya hai.
deviji ka hriday b da kathor tha. bat-bat par us nanhean-se balak ko jhi dak detian, kabhi-kabhi mar baithati thian. mujhe us vakt aisa krodh ata tha ki use khoob daantooan. apane balak par mata itana krodh kar sakati hai, yah maianne aj hi dekha.
jab doosare din ham log haridvar ki ga di mean baithe, to balak mera ho chuka tha. maian tumase kya kahooan babooji, mere stanoan mean doodh bhi utar aya aur mata ko maianne is bhar se bhi mukt kar diya.
haridvar mean ham log ek dharmashala mean thahare. maian balak ke moh-pash mean bandhi huee us danpatti ke pichhe-pichhe phira karati. maian ab usaki lauandi thi. bachche ka mal-mootr dhona mera kam tha, use doodh pilati, khilati. mata ka jaise gala chhoot gaya lekin maian is seva mean magan thi. deviji jitani alasin aur ghamandin thian, lalaji utane hi shilavanh aur dayalu the. vah meri taraph kabhi aankh uthakar bhi n dekhate. agar maian kamare mean akeli hoti, to kabhi aandar n jate. kuchh-kuchh tumhare hi jaisa svabhav tha. mujhe un par daya ati thi. us karkasha ke sath unaka jivan is tarah kat raha tha, mano billi ke panje mean chooha ho. vah unhean bat-bat par jhi dakati. bechare khisiyakar rah jate.
pandrah din bit ge the. devaji ne ghar lautane ke lie kaha. babooji abhi vahaan kuchh din aur rahana chahate the. is bat par takarar ho gee. maian baramade mean balak ko lie kh di thi. deviji ne garam hokar kaha-tumhean rahana ho to raho, maian to aj jaooangi. tumhari aankhoan rasta nahian dekha hai.
pati ne darate-darate kaha-yahaan das-paanch din rahane mean haraj hi kya hai- mujhe to tumhare svasthy mean abhi koee tabadili nahian dikhati.
'ap mere svasthy ki chianta chho die. maian itani jald nahian mari ja rahi hooan. sach kahate ho, tum mere svasthy ke lie yahaan thaharana chahate ho?'
'aur kisalie aya tha.'
'ae chahe jis kam ke lie ho par tum mere svasthy ke lie nahian thahar rahe ho. yah pakriyaan un striyoan ko padhao, jo tumhare hathakande n janati hoan. maian tumhari nas-nas pahachanati hooan. tum thaharana chahate ho vihar ke lie, kri da ke lie...'
babooji ne hath jo dakar kaha-achchha, ab rahane do binni, kalankit n karo. maian aj hi chala jaooanga.
deviji itani sasti vijay pakar prasann n hueean. abhi unake man ka gubar to nikalane hi nahian paya tha. boli-haan, chale kyoan n chaloge, yahi to tum chahate the. yahaan paise kharch hote haian n le jakar usi kal-kothari mean dal do. koee mare ya jie, tumhari bala se. ek mar jaegi, to doosari phir a jaegi, balki aur nee-naveli. tumhari chaandi hi chaandi hai. socha tha, yahaan kuchh din rahooangi par tumhare mare kahian rahane paooan. bhagavanh bhi nahian utha lete ki gala chhoot jae.
amar ne poochha-un babooji ne sachamuch koee shararat ki thi, ya mithya arop tha-
munni ne muanh pherakar muskarate hue kaha-lala, tumhari samajh b di moti hai. vah dayan mujh par arop kar rahi thi. bechare babooji dabe jate the ki kahian vah chu dail bat kholakar n kah de, hath jo date the, minnatean karate the par vah kisi tarah ras n hoti thi.
aankhean matakakar boli-bhagavanh ne mujhe bhi aankhean di haian, aandhi nahian hooan. maian to kamare mean p di-p di karahooan aur tum bahar gulachharre u dao dil bahalane ko koee shagal chahie.
dhire-dhire mujh par rahasy khulane laga. man mean aisi jvala uthi ki abhi isaka muanh noch looan. maian tumase koee parada nahian rakhati lala, maianne babooji ki or kabhi aankh uthakar dekha bhi n tha par yah chu dail mujhe kalank laga rahi thi. babooji ka lihaz n hota, to maian us chu dail ka mizaj thik kar deti, jahaan suee n chubhe, vahaan gal chubhae deti.
akhir babooji ko bhi krodh aya .
'tum bilakul jhooth bolati ho. sarasar jhooth.'
'maian sarasar jhooth bolati hooan?'
'haan, sarasar jhooth bolati ho.'
'kha jao apane bete ki kasam.'
mujhe chupachap vahaan se tal jana chahie tha lekin apane is man ko kya karooan, jisase anyay nahian dekha jata. mera chehara mare krodh ke tamatama utha. maianne usake samane jakar kaha-bahooji, bas ab jaban band karo, nahian to achchha n hoga. maian tarah deti jati hooan aur tum sir chadhati jati ho. maian tumhean sharif samajhakar tumhare sath thahar gee thi. agar janati ki tumhara svabhav itana nich hai, to tumhari parachhaeean se bhagati. maian harajaee nahian hooan, n anath hooan ,bhagavanh ki daya se mere bhi pati haian, putr hai. kismat ka khel hai ki yahaan akeli p di hooan. maian tumhare pati ko pair dhone ke jog bhi nahian samajhati. maian use bulae deti hooan, tum bhi dekh lo, bas aj aur kal rah jao.
abhi mere muanh se poori bat bhi n nikalane paee thi ki mere svami mere lal ko god mean lie akar aangan mean kh de ho ge aur mujhe dekhate hi lapakakar meri taraph chale. maian unhean dekhate hi aisi ghabara gee, mano koee sianh a gaya ho, turant apani kothari mean jakar bhitar se dvar band kar lie. chhati dha d-dha d kar rahi thi par kiva d ki darar mean aankh lagae dekh rahi thi. svami ka chehara sanvalaya hua tha, baloan par dhool jami huee thi, pith par kanbal aur lutiya-dor rakhe hath mean lanba latth lie bhauchakke se kh de the.
babooji ne bahar akar svami se poochha-achchha, ap hi inake pati haian. ap khoob ae. abhi to vah ap hi ki charcha kar rahi thian. aie, kap de utarie. magar bahan bhitar kyoan bhag geean. yahaan paradesh mean kaun parada-
mere svami ko to tumane dekha hi hai. unake samane babooji bilakul aise lagate the, jaise saand ke samane nata bail.
svami ne babooji ko javab n diya, mere dvar par akar bole-munni, yah kya aandher karati ho- maian tin din se tumhean khoj raha hooan. aj mili bhi, to bhitar ja baithi eeshvar ke lie kiva d khol do aur meri du:kh katha sun lo, phir tumhari jo ichchha ho karana.
meri aankhoan se aansoo bah rahe the. ji chahata tha, kiva d kholakar bachche ko god mean le looan.
par n jane man ke kisi kone mean koee baitha hua kah raha tha-khabaradar, jo bachche ko god mean liya jaise koee pyas se t dapata hua adami pani ka baratan dekhakar toote par koee usase kah de, pani jootha hai. ek man kahata tha, svami ka anadar mat kar, eeshvar ne jo patni aur mata ka nata jo d diya hai, vah kya kisi ke to de toot sakata hai doosara man kahata tha, too ab apane pati ko pati aur putr ko putr nahian kah sakati. kshanik moh ke avesh mean p dakar too kya un donoan ko kalankit kar degi .
maian kiva d chho dakar kh di ho gee .
bachche ne kiva d ko apani nanhian-nanhian hatheliyoan se pichhe dhakelane ke lie zor lagakar kaha-teyal tholo .
yah totale bol kitane mithe the jaise sannate mean kisi shanka se bhayabhit hokar ham gane lagate haian, apane shabdoan se dukele hone ki kalpana kar lete haian. maian bhi is samay apane um date hue pyar ko rokane ke lie bol uthi-tum kyoan mere pichhe p de ho- kyoan nahian samajh lete ki maian mar gee- tum thakur hokar bhi itane dil ke kachche ho- ek tuchchh nari ke lie apana kul-marajad dubae dete ho. jakar apana byah kar lo aur bachche ko palo. is jivan mean mera tumase koee nata nahian hai. haan, bhagavanh se yahi maangati hooan ki doosare janm mean tum phir mujhe milo. kyoan meri tek to d rahe ho, mere man ko kyoan moh mean dal rahe ho- patita ke sath tum sukh se n rahogi. mujh par daya karo, aj hi chale jao, nahian maian sach kahati hooan, zahar kha looangi.
svami ne karoon agrah se kaha-maian tumhare lie apani kul-maryada, bhaee-band sab kuchh chho d dooanga. mujhe kisi ki paravah nahian. ghar mean ag lag jae, mujhe chianta nahian. maian ya to tumhean lekar jaooanga, ya yahian ganga mean doob marooanga. agar mere man mean tumase ratti bhar mail ho, to bhagavanh mujhe sau bar narak dean. agar tumhean nahian chalana hai to tumhara balak tumhean sauanpakar maian jata hooan. ise maro ya jilao, maian phir tumhare pas n aooanga. agar kabhi sudhi ae, to chulloo bhar pani de dena.
lala, socho, maian kitane b de sankat mean p di huee thi. svami bat ke dhani haian, yah maian janati thi. pran ko vah kitana tuchchh samajhate haian, yah bhi mujhase chhipa n tha. phir bhi maian apana hriday kathor kie rahi. jara bhi narm p di aur sarvanash hua. maianne patthar ka kaleja banakar kaha-agar tum balak ko mere pas chho dakar ge, to usaki hatya tumhare oopar hogi, kyoanki maian usaki durgati dekhane ke lie jina nahian chahati. usake palane ka bhar tumhare oopar hai, tum jano tumhara kam jane. mere lie jivan mean agar koee sukh tha, to yahi ki mera putr aur svami kushal se haian. tum mujhase yah sukh chhin lena chahate ho, chhin lo magar yad rakho vah mere jivan ka adhar hai.
maianne dekha svami ne bachche ko utha liya, jise ek kshan pahale god se utar diya tha aur ulate paanv laut p de. unaki aankhoan se aansoo jari the, aur nahian kaanp rahe the.
deviji ne bhalamanasi se kam lekar svami ko baithana chaha, poochhane lagian-kya bat hai, kyoan roothi huee haian par svami ne koee javab n diya. baboo sahab phatak tak unhean pahuanchane ge. kah nahian sakati, donoan janoan mean kya batean hueean par anuman karati hooan ki babooji ne meri prashansa ki hogi. mera dil ab bhi kaanp raha tha ki kahian svami sachamuch atmaghat n kar lean. deviyoan aur devataoan ki manautiyaan kar rahi thi ki mere pyaroan ki raksha karana.
jyoanhi babooji laute, maianne dhire se kiva d kholakar poochha-kidhar ge- kuchh aur kahate the-
babooji ne tiraskar-bhari aankhoan se dekhakar kaha-kahate kya, muanh se avaz bhi to nikale. hichaki baandhi huee thi. ab bhi kushal hai, jakar rok lo. vah gangaji ki or hi ge haian. tum itani dayavan hokar bhi itani kathor ho, yah aj hi maloom hua. garib, bachchoan ki tarah ththak-ththatakar ro raha tha.
maian sankat ki us dasha ko pahuanch chuki thi, jab adami parayoan ko apana samajhane lagata hai. daantakar boli-tab bhi tum dau de yahaan chale ae. unake sath kuchh der rah jate, to chhote n ho jate, aur n yahaan deviji ko koee utha le jata. is samay vah ape mean nahian haian, phir bhi tum unhean chho dakar bhage chale ae.
deviji bolian-yahaan n dau de ate, to kya jane maian kahian nikal bhagati- lo, akar ghar mean baitho. maian jati hooan. pak dakar ghasit n laooan, to apane bap ki nahian .
dharmashala mean bisoan hi yatri tike hue the. sab apane-apane dvar par kh de yah tamasha dekh rahe the. deviji jyoanhi nikalian, char-paanch adami unake sath ho lie. adha ghante mean sabhi laut ae. maloom hua ki vah steshan ki taraph chale ge.
par maian jab tak unhean ga di par savar hote n dekh looan chain kahaan- ga di prat:kal jaegi. rat-bhar vah steshan par raheange. jyoanhi aandhera ho gaya, maian steshan ja pahuanchi. vah ek vriksh ke niche kanbal bichhae baithe hue the. mera bachcha lote ko ga di banakar dor se khianch raha tha. bar-bar girata tha aur uthakar khianchane lagata tha. maian ek vriksh ki a d mean baithakar yah tamasha dekhane lagi. tarah-tarah ki batean man mean ane lagian. biradari ka hi to dar hai. maian apane pati ke sath kisi doosari jagah rahane lagooan, to biradari kya kar legi lekin kya ab maian vah ho sakati hooan, jo pahale thi-
ek kshan ke bad phir vahi kalpana. svami ne saf kaha hai, unaka dil saf hai. batean banane ki unaki adat nahian. to vah koee bat kaheange hi kyoan, jo mujhe lage. g de murade ukha dane ki unaki adat nahian. vah mujhase kitana prem karate the. ab bhi unaka hriday vahi hai. maian vyarth ke sankoch mean p dakar unaka aur apana jivan chaupat kar rahi hooan lekin
...lekin maian ab kya vah ho sakati hooan, jo pahale thi- nahian, ab maian vah nahian ho sakati.
patidev ab mera pahale se adhik adar kareange. maian janati hooan. maian ghi ka gh da bhi ludhaka dooangi, to kuchh n kaheange. vah utana hi prem kareange lekin vah bat kahaan, jo pahale thi. ab to meri dasha us rogini ki-si hogi, jise koee bhojan ruchikar nahian hota.
to phir maian jianda hi kyoan rahooan- jab jivan mean koee sukh nahian, koee abhilasha nahian, to vah vyarth hai. kuchh din aur ro liya, to isase kya- kaun janata hai, kya-kya kalank sahane p dean kya-kya durdasha ho- mar jana kahian achchha.
yah nishchay karake maian uthi. samane hi patidev so rahe the. balak bhi p da sota tha. oh kitana prabal bandhan tha jaise soom ka dhan ho. vah use khata nahian, deta nahian, isake siva use aur kya santosh hai ki usake pas dhan hai. is bat se hi usake man mean kitana bal a jata hai maian usi moh ko to dane ja rahi thi.
maian darate-darate, jaise pranoan ko aankhoan mean lie, patidev ke samip gee par vahaan ek kshan bhi kh di n rah saki. jaise loha khianchakar chuanbak se ja chipatata hai, usi tarah maian unake mukh ki or khianchi ja rahi thi. maianne apane man ka sara bal lagakar usaka moh to d diya aur usi avesh mean dau di huee ganga ke tat par aee. moh ab bhi man se chipata hua tha. maian ganga mean kood p di.
amar ne katar hokar kaha-ab nahian suna jata, munni phir kabhi kahana.
munni muskarakar boli-vah, ab rah kya gaya- maian kitani der pani mean rahi, kah nahian sakati, jab hosh aya, to isi ghar mean p di huee thi. maian bahati chali jati thi. prat:kal chaudhari ka b da l daka sumer ganga nahane gaya aur mujhe utha laya. tab se maian yahian hooan. achhootoan ki is jhoanp di mean mujhe jo sukh aur shaanti mili usaka bakhan kya karooan. kashi aur payag mujhe bhabhi kahate haian, par sumer mujhe bahan kahata tha. maian abhi achchhi tarah uthane-baithane n paee thi ki vah paralok sidhar gaya.
amar ke man mean ek kaanta barabar khatak raha tha. vah kuchh to nikala par abhi kuchh baki tha.
'sumer ko tumase prem to hoga hi?'
munni ke tevar badal ge-haan tha, aur tho da nahian, bahut tha, to phir usamean mera kya bas- jab maian svasth ho gee, to ek din usane mujhase apana prem prakat kiya. maianne krodh ko hansi mean lapetakar kaha-kya tum is roop mean mujhase neki ka badala chahate ho- agar yah niyat hai, to mujhe phir le jakar ganga mean duba do. agar is niyat se tumane meri pran-raksha ki, to tumane mere sath b da anyay kiya. tum janate ho, maian kaun hooan- rajapootani hooan. phir kabhi bhoolakar bhi mujhase aisi bat n kahana, nahian ganga yahaan se door nahian hai. sumer aisa lajjit hua ki phir mujhase bat tak nahian ki par mere shabdoan ne usaka dil to d diya. ek din meri pasaliyoan mean dard hone laga. usane samajha bhoot ka pher hai. ojha ko bulane gaya. nadi chadhi huee thi. doob gaya. mujhe usaki maut ka jitana du:kh hua utana hi apane sage bhaee ke marane ka hua tha. nichoan mean bhi aise devata hote haian, isaka mujhe yahian akar pata laga. vah kuchh din aur ji jata, to is ghar ke bhag jag jate. sare gaanv ka gulam tha. koee gali de, daante, kabhi javab n deta.
amar ne poochha-tab se tumhean pati aur bachche ki khabar n mili hogi-
munni ki aankhoan se tap-tap aansoo girane lage. rote-rote hichaki bandh gee. phir sisak-sisakakar boli-svami prat:kal phir dharmashala mean ge. jab unhean maloom ha ki maian rat ko vahaan nahian gee, to mujhe khojane lage. jidhar koee mera pata bata deta udhar hi chale jate. ek mahine tak vah sare ilake mean mare-mare phire. isi nirasha aur chianta mean vah kuchh sanak ge. phir haridvar ae ab ki balak unake sath n tha. koee poochhata tumhara l daka kya hua, to hasanne lagate. jab maian achchhi ho gee aur chalane-phirane lagi, to ek din ji mean aya, haridvar jakar dekhooan, meri chizean kahaan geean. tin mahine se jyada ho ge the. milane ki asha to n thi par isi bahane svami ka kuchh pata lagana chahati thi. vichar tha-ek chit़thi likhakar chho d dooan. us dharmashala ke samane pahuanchi, to dekha, bahut se adami dvar par jama haian. maian bhi chali gee. ek adami ki lash thi. log kah rahe the, vahi pagal hai, vahi jo apani bibi ko khojata phirata tha. maian pahachan gee. vah mere svami the. yah sab batean muhalle valoan se maloom hueean. chhati pitakar rah gee. jis sarvanash se darati thi, vah ho hi gaya. janati ki yah hone vala hai, to pati ke sath hi n chali jati. eeshvar ne mujhe dohari saza di lekin adami b da behaya hai. ab marate bhi n bana. kisake lie marati- khati-piti bhi hooan, hansati-bolati bhi hooan, jaise kuchh hua hi nahian. bas, yahi meri ram-kahani hai.